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How to Get Over A Break Up Fast and Painlessly

Wondering how to get over a break up?

Breakups are tough times. What would you do in these situations?

Break up heartYour lover packs up and leaves without a single word or explanation (Baby!?! Where you goin’?)

Break up heartYou’re heartbroken and your situation seems hopeless :(

Break up heartGetting out of bed becomes a daily struggle (and binge eating seems the best way to deal with it)

Break up heartYou get depressed and don’t know what to do (but you know this is NO WAY to live your life)

Break up heartWhat if you’re happy to be done with your ex, but can’t quite seem to move on?

Break up heartWhat if the mere thought of your ex with another man or woman throws you into Hulk-like rage?

getting over a break up sucks

Broken hearts take time to heal…but our tips can fix them faster!

How would you deal with these problems and get back on your feet in less than 2 weeks? If you’re at all like most people, then you don’t have a clear plan for dealing with a break up. After all, when you’re in a happy, loving relationship, why would you prepare for the end of it!Breakups are huge problems! It can take months and even years for the average person to get over a rough break up.

Breakups come in many different flavors: the Sweet “Let’s be friends, I still want to see you”, the Sour “Get away from me and stay out of my life…forever!” and the Mystery flavor “I don’t know what I want right now, but I need some time alone.” All of these lines have the same effect — they hurt to hear and can leave you devastated for weeks, months or even years. Even if you were the one to initiate the breakup, you could still be going through a rough time — and that’s totally okay.

Break up pain is a normal part of life that everyone goes through many times before finding Mr. or Mrs. Right. Wikipedia states that “roughly one-third of Americans have been through a breakup in the past ten years.” Among younger people I’m sure this statistic is a lot higher!

However, there are healthy and constructive ways to learn how to get over a break up and then there are…not so good methods. Some people can get over a past relationship in just a few days, while others need help and time. We’ve rounded up all of the best relationship and dating advice from across the Internet (and the world really) and distilled it into an easy-to-follow video course.

Here are a few things you can do to deal with a break up:

Break up heartCut your ex from your life. Now that your relationship is over, there’s really no reason why you should keep in contact with your ex. In fact, the more contact you have, the more you’ll think about your past. Drop your ex from your life like a bad habit for at least a few weeks. Forget about that “let’s be friends” stuff.

Break up heartLet your emotions out! Anger, depression, frustration, sadness…whatever emotions are bottled up in your right now need to be let out. If you need a day or two to cry on the couch, that’s perfectly fine, but your priority is finding good outlets for your feelings. Check out activities in your area, catch up with your friends, play sports…whatever interests you is perfect as long as it keeps you active and gives you some kind of emotional release.

Break up heartPamper yourself! What special treats do you rarely indulge yourself in? An excellent home-cooked dinner, a trip to the spa, a makeover/manicure/pedicure, shopping or a sports night with the guys are all good ideas for starters. Pampering yourself shows you that you are worth special treatment and helps fight off some of the depression and neediness that comes with some break ups.

Break up heartGive yourself enough time. Sometimes it can take months to get over your past relationship. Some people can cope faster than others, and if you’re still hurting after a few weeks, then you need to keep reminding yourself that things will get better eventually.

Break up heartKeep a journal. I know it sounds a little silly, but putting your thoughts on paper often opens up new doors and possibilities that you wouldn’t have thought of otherwise. Writing also lets you keep track of your emotional well-being: you’ll be able to look back at your journal and see how much progress you’ve made over the past days/weeks/months. Free writing is also a great emotional release for many people.

It’s also equally important to look at behavior that will do you more harm than good during your recovery period. Avoid these pitfalls:

Break up heartDon’t try to be friends with your ex! I mentioned this earlier, but it’s so important that it needs to be said twice. The more time you spend around your ex, the more likely you are to stay emotionally attached to him or her. Whether you want to get your ex back or just get over your break up, DO NOT get on the slippery slope of staying friends.

Break up heartPut all your relationship mementos in a box and keep it out of sight. Jewelery, photos, presents and other trinkets that remind you of your ex need to be out of your life just like your ex! It might be a little rash to throw everything away at once, so box it up and stash it somewhere until you’re ready to deal with the items.

Break up heartDon’t be too hard on yourself. It’s tempting and almost natural to have an internal dialogue with yourself and try to take all the blame, but this approach will only make you more depressed. Keep your thoughts positive and remind yourself how incredible you are at everything you do.

Break up heartDon’t waste energy hating your ex. It’s so tempting to start nasty rumors about your ex, talk trash online and go out-of-your way to cause your ex to hurt. Resist your negative impulses! People around you will pick up on your bitterness and it will only come back to haunt you later on. There are far better ways to spend your time and energy.

Break up heartDon’t keep your ex’s contact information! Honestly, I’m a big advocate for erasing your ex’s phone numbers and email addresses and deleting him or her from your facebook/myspace/other social network. Ever send your ex a text at 4 am that you regretted a few hours later? Me too! Deleted contact info is the best way to prevent these embarrassments from happening. It also goes hand-in-hand with the “cut your ex from your life” philosophy. If you ever really need to get in touch with your ex, then it should be pretty easy to dig out the contact information from one of your friends, anyway. Click here for an extensive post on your no contact with your ex.

Still not sure how to get over a broken heart?

Don’t worry! None of these emotions and actions are your fault. If you think back to “Health” class in school, we are never taught how to cope with the end of a relationship and overcome these strong emotions. By coming to this website you’ve acknowledged that something needs to change and you’ve taken the first step towards addressing your situation. Yes! If you want to get over your breakup and move on with your life…or win your ex back…or just get control of your emotions again, then we can help.

Here’s one more thing you could do right now to start forgetting about your ex:

*Make new social connections online: Sites like meetup.com give you free access to events/gatherings/hang outs in your area. If you live in a big city and are having trouble because all of your friends are some how connected to your ex, then this could be the way to go! Make a free profile and search for other like-minded people around you.

Sign up for our video course and we’ll send a 15-minute video showing you the biggest secret to getting over your relationship…and how to get your ex back (if you want!). It’s SO simple, yet most people overlook this one trick. You’ll also get a free download of our guide “How to Get Over a Breakup in Two Weeks” AND we’ll send you 4 more videos over the next week covering topics like the two emotions that preventing you from moving on, what to do when you have to speak with your ex and how to build up the self esteem needed to get back on track…all this for FREE. What are you waiting for? Click below and we’ll show you the first steps you can take right now.

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33 Responses to “How to Get Over A Break Up Fast and Painlessly”

  1. Btmground says:

    Send me the video please!

  2. Michelle says:

    Thanks so much for the great tips! these are SUCH a help!

  3. Mike says:

    This is really excellent stuff. It’s hard now that she left me, but things are looking up for me. Can I email you for some 1-on-1 advice please?

  4. admin says:

    Sure Mike, drop me a line on the contact page (linked above) and I’ll be glad to help you out.

  5. Sarada Sapphire says:

    Good advice

  6. Roger B. says:

    Hi, I watched all your videos and loved them. I have a question though: how am I supposed to stop all contact with my ex if I work in the same building with her and have to see her everyday? It sucks! please advise :(

  7. admin says:

    Hey Roger,

    In cases like that the best thing you can do is just smile and deal with it :)

    Keep it professional all the time and don’t speak with her unless your job/task requires it. Things will get easier with time!

    To everyone else: I’ve got your emails and have been working through them the past few days, so if you haven’t heard back, expect something from me this week!

    cheers!

  8. hunter says:

    hey i have no idea what to do my girlfreind just dumped me for her x because she still has feelings for him i dont know what to do please help!

  9. Larry says:

    Hi My name is “Larry” just want to share my experience with the world on how i got my love back and saved my marriage… I was married for 7years with 2kids and we lived happily until things started getting ugly and we had fights and arguments almost every time… it got worse at a point that she filed for divorce… I tried my best to make her change her mind & stay with me cause i loved her with all my heart and didn’t want to loose her but everything just didn’t work out… she moved out of the house and still went ahead to file for divorce… I pleaded and tried everything but still nothing worked. The breakthrough came when someone introduced me to this wonderful, great spell caster who eventually helped me out… I have never been a fan of things like this but just decided to try reluctantly cause I was desperate and left with no choice… He did special prayers and used roots and herbs… Within 7 days she called me and was sorry for all the emotional trauma she had cost me, moved back to the house and we continue to live happily, the kids are happy too and we are expecting our third child… I have introduced him to a lot of couples with problems across the world and they have had good news… Just thought I should share my experience cause I strongly believe someone out there need’s it… You can email me on larryjms49 at gmail dot com to get the spell caster’s contact… Don’t give up just yet, the different between “Ordinary” & “Extra-Ordinary” is the “Extra” so make extra effort to save your marriage/relationship if it’s truly worth it.

  10. evan says:

    Hey hunter,

    post some info or send me an email through the contact page and I’ll see what I can do to help you out.

  11. jina says:

    Hi, thanks a ton for this article! it really helps sooth breakup pain. this no contact stuff is great! i have a few personal questions though, can you email me?

  12. nicole says:

    hi my name is nicole,
    my boyfriend all of a sudden started to act wierd on a monday night then he ignored me , hung out with me on wensday then ignored me for 3 days and hes never done that before. i tried to talk to him, but hed act like he dont care. weve been together for 2years. and i love him so much. he pretty much dumped me cause he doesnt bother to talk to me. and when i texted him he wouldnt reply. and hed act like nothing.
    please help, im so depressed. he was my first love and boyfriend.

  13. Alexandra says:

    OMG Nicole, that is exactly what’s going on with me. I’m going crazy I don’t know what to do anymore. What should I do? Help.. It just hurts to much…

  14. nina says:

    hey, thanks for the article. I learned quite a few things…still feel terrible about my breakup. but hopefully things will turn around soon.

    :)

  15. josh says:

    How is a guy supposed to pamper himself? lulz
    ah well, i need an excuse to play a marathon session of games. This works for me!

  16. Kristybrea says:

    Hi my name is kristy and i’m 15 and just lost my first bf. i love him so much and want 2 get him back but these tips are more for older peeps. do they still work for me?

  17. JJ says:

    My father worked in relationship counseling for about 20 years and I have to say that a lot the information here is spot on and what I’d hear when he talked about his job.

    Basically, if you want to deal with a breakup, then you DO need to focus on yourself and forget about your ex for quite a while. This is probably the one thing that’ll make or ruin your situation.

    ~JJ

  18. Joel says:

    cheers for this article. It’s one of the better relationship-help guides I’ve seen online. How do I watch the videos though? they won’t load on my iPhone.

  19. Diana says:

    Thanks for the article!! It was very helpful! I feel a little better already. Funny thing- my ex keeps trying to contact me after he was the one who ended everything, I havent answered. Sometimes I have felt that I should have answered his calls and give “being friends” a try. But you are right, if I want to really get over him, he has to disapear out of my life. Thanks for the good advice! :)

  20. evan says:

    Joel – The main video should work on your iPhone/iPod as long as you click the link to youtube. The rest of our videos are not on youtube, but I’ve tested them and they should work on an apple device just fine.

    Email me if you’re still having issues with the site and I’ll sort you out. :)

  21. Allan says:

    Hi I definitely know that spending time with people who like you and care about you is a great way to help you get over your break up. Keep up the great work.

  22. Pam says:

    Does it all this count ifs been 2 YEARS and you still can\\\’t get over them? I mean, how long does this crap take???? She travels alot and I watch OUR dogs at her house because thats the only time I get to see them. I can\\\’t even sleep in the bed..I find odd phone #,s, sex toys, all this crap, but I won\\\’t lose my dogs over this. How do I handle this friggin situation? U go from so angry I want to kill her to so depressed I just cry all night. And no I have no gealth insurance cause you can bet your butt I\\\’d be in therapy if I could afford it.

    Can you help a deseperate fool like me?

  23. Monique says:

    I was not even technically in a relationship but so emotionally involved. He kindof ployed and pushed the emotion to develop then as it did stepped away. Now I am torn and confused and don’t know what to do.

  24. PRI says:

    I like all your advise but I don\’t think any of it works in my situation , or does it ? …. Me and my ex met online 11 months ago , we both are from the same town in new York went to difference hs and at the time we both went to different colleges , she was in Vermont and I am at ayracuse . First five months were just getting to know each other, meeting eachother during breaks becoming involved . We both hit it off right away , we had alot in common except for her being a country girl and me being a city boy. But we both came out of a long relationship with are high school sweet hearts but the difference between me and her is that I do not stay in touch with ex and she stayed friends with her ex (hs sweet heart) but when we got involve she stopped talking to him because she didn\’t want anything to come between us .. So then the school year ended in may and I asked her to be my gd after 8 months of talking and waiting because she was going to transfer to a school closer to home and near me .. So now we are dating and armrest a month of dating we decided to move in , well she wanted to get her own place and i was pretty much dragged along and ti make things more interesting I started working for her dad who is still now my current boss and we are also best friends and me and her little brothers and sisters are very attached. So the first two months living together were fine until school started again , when we first dated she told me she waste into partying anymore and just focus on school which is one of the reasons I fell for her because I been single for a year before her and told myself my next one is going to be a long term with no problem .. So once school started she been taking her stress home from
    School letting it out on me in which I just dealt with it and then she wants to party again whichbat first I didn\’t want to deal with. But then tries to seal with but everytime we out to party together we got inti be fights . So the past three week she been partying with her friends and doesn\’t want to with me . And what made me mad was because of school and hw and work the only time we has together was bed time and weekends . Okay so now to the present … She has been considering breaking up with me for the past two weeks , she feels because we are 19 and 20 that it\’s too soon to be committed right now but because she loves me she wants to in the future . So the whole two weeks we are fighting at do you want to
    Be together or not . Then this weekend we got into a fight over the phone while she was partying at her friends college , so then she blacked out drunk the next night and woke up in some
    Boy bed .. She came home Sunday and she finally told me . I cried and she cried ..she tells me she thought we were broken up and so she got very drunk , but none of us said it was over so I guess she pretty much cheated on me . So it\’s been two days now , that night I told her give me two weeks to move out and me and you are done for sure now .. But the problems are : I still work for her dad , he loves me and is mad that me and her are together , her family loves me and is mad we are not together … We still live together right now for two weeks , we have been talking but it\’s very weird , one minute I\’m nice and we are talking and then next I\’m pissed off asking questions and what not wanting to see who she is talking too and texting .. I do know that she Is texting her ex bf again who has a GF tho but i am
    Pissed off because she doesn\’t even text me or talk to me first but she texts her ex every sec .. It\’s very weird we talk every night before bed I been talking to her when I want to ignore her but I can\’t because i live with her and even when I am
    Not with her I get the urgh to text her . So when we talk at night we are saying stuff like : she tells me she loves me and crystal herself to sleep and cares about me and doesn\’t know what she wants and how she doesn\’t want to commit now but still wants me in her life . And I am telling her I feel but also have angry outburst mostly saying the stuff about last weekend and what she did . Soooooo what do I do? I live with her now for two weeks , I work for her dad which I still want too but most of the work is at his family farm where she is at once in a while .. WhAt do I do now until I move out ? I\’m nice talking to her at night but I\’m the morning after not being able to eat and sleep because of all of this .. What do I do once I move out . Do I talk to her at all , what if she texts me ? Please give me
    Some
    Advise if you can , I am stressed out and so confused !!!!!
    This I yell at her .

  25. stephanie yu says:

    but what do i do if all of my life is based around doing stuff with my ex? this sux, help me out please…strugglin real hard here :(

  26. rodrigo says:

    breaking up with a long term relationship always seems hard to cope with it. But what is happening to me today its has not been the first time in my life, actually if i got over my last girlfriend i will definitely will get over this one. Anyways i was the one who dumped her. So i just gonna follow your advises, especially the one that says “erased all contact info from her” i just hope and wait for the best.

  27. michelle says:

    hi, thanks for this article. it’s been a big help since my bf just left me, but I need to know if we can get back together or not. do you have any tips to know for sure?

    thanks so much <3

  28. sami thomas says:

    interesting approach, if I want to stay friends with my ex do you think I should start the non contact thing?
    we get along really well still, I just don’t want to be depressed all the time anymore!

  29. Andy F. says:

    There\’s some really good advice here. It\’s helped me quite a bit. The part about spending time with your hobbies is so important-it made me feel quite a bit better, and has helped a little for forgetin about my evil ex girlfriend. ahhhhh she still makes me so mad!!!!!!

  30. Jonathon says:

    cheers man! I’ve almost forgot about my stupid ex. the problem is I keep dreaming about our relationship?!?! any advice on that?

    jon

  31. sarah says:

    How am I supposed to make new friends and find new things to do if I live in a small town with literally 3000 people?!? Any ideas on this? I’m racking my brain trying to think of a way to forget about my ex.

    >sarah

  32. sam says:

    Some good ideas in the comments here. I’d like to see a response to Sarah’s post above since I’m in about the same situation myself. thanks in advance!

  33. jenna says:

    how long should this take? i followed some of these tips, but still feel really bad! it\’s been at least 3 weeks!! help1 plz

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